Friday 1 January 2021

2020... You weren't so bad

You've probably read the title of this post and thought what is she on but hear me out... 

2020 will be known for a lot of things - a global pandemic, horrific loss of life, the year we all ran out of toilet roll apart from a few selfish souls and the one where we stayed at home. Over the last few weeks while I've taken a much-needed break with my family I've been reflecting a lot on this year and the positives it gave to us because unbelievably there were some. 

This time in 2019 we had just wrapped up Christmas and New Year and ya know what? I was exhausted. The lead up to December saw me at numerous events, reviewing shows and Christmas menus as well as creating my Christmas content and by the time the big day actually rolled around I was tired and full of a cold. My much-needed break over the festive period was just a few days long before I was back at my desk writing, creating and doing my tax return. 

This year, however, has given me the beauty of time, something I didn't appreciate until this year...

I've mentioned a few times over the year how the pandemic has put things into perspective for me and it's true - in a strange way I needed it, I just wish it hadn't been at the cost of so many lives, our economy, redundancies and so much more. 

We've missed our family terribly and I cannot wait to give them all a very long overdue hug but for our own little family unit of three, it's been just what we needed. This time has been the longest we've all spent together since Arran's paternity finished in November 2017 which makes me kinda sad. Sure we live together and have our evenings and weekends to make memories but in the midst of work, everyday life, chores and everything else we've never just had weeks to do as we please. 

It's been freeing, it's put a lot into perspective and it has really made us think about what we want our lives to look like going forward.

This time has also given me a chance to slow down. In normal circumstances, I'm a stay at home mum during the day and blogger in the evenings - whether that's working at home, out at events or away on press visits. My time is usually pretty chocker with things to do and having everything cancel one by one in March last year meant I really did have a lot of spare time all of a sudden and it's been nice.

I know I've been lucky and in a fortunate position - I have a loving partner, a wonderful son, amazing family and friends and a job that enables me to work anywhere all while being the primary carer. Sure, a little more money might help or a holiday home in a far-flung hot country but overall I love the life I've built with Arran and the ease of our day to day lives but there's nothing quite like isolation to really make you take stock of what you have.

The stresses have quite obviously taken their toll at times - I've cried, shouted and curled into a ball but I've also laughed and smiled a lot, I feel like I've gone through every emotion over the last year as the reality of what is happening hits closer but it's also shown me what I'm grateful for. 

We took things back to basics with so much last year - nature, adventures, cooking and baking and our lives in general and with 2021 looking to be much the same with a national lockdown imminent our aim is to do similar minus the rush to make a hobby out of everything which was our mistake during the first lockdown. 

That's not to say I don't miss life pre-pandemic, of course I do but in a strange roundabout way it has shown us what we value most and we needed that. 

We're all so go, go go that sometimes you just need to stop and take stock of what you have instead of worrying about what we don't have. 

Although if a wedding could be in our plans soon without another postpone that would be great too! 

How do you feel about 2020?

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